Saturday, August 10, 2013

Mom competition - Stop it

I don't really do politically charged subjects on my blog, it's just not my thing. But I must say this topic gets to me every time. Probably because I am a mom and I think it's important to discuss things that relate to our kids.

So yeah, this mom competition thing going on around the world is taking on a new level of crazy. I am not talking about being proud of your children's achievement and sharing it with the world, hello that's just normal behavior. As parents we are proud of our children and want to celebrate every little achievement or milestone. I am talking about belittling other people's children's achievement for no good reason at all. Creating a competition that is completely unnecessary and just down right toxic.

Great examples that just happened in the last few days

Me - OMG, my 11-month Jbird is walking, YAY. I am so proud of him
Acquaintance - Isn't he a little slow, my daughter was walking at 8 months
(Really lady, who calls someone else child slow to their face)

My friend - My 20-month son born at 28 weeks finally took a few steps. We are over the moon
Acquaintance - It's about time he joined his peer, my son was walking at 9 months.
(Really, is it necessary to mention your child superb achievement in this instance. Absolutely not. A simple "congrats, well done" would have suffice.)

Why do you have to put someone else's child down for no good reason. Now, if you want to mention that your child is doing much better than that other person's child, this is not the forum. Maybe call your mom or your husband or something. No seriously, they might care but that's about it.

Last week one of my favorite bloggers posted about her daughter's milestone and one of the comments was downright rude.

Blogger - I am so excited my 3-month old baby is on the verge of rolling over
Commenter - My 5-week old baby rolled over twice already and is scooting around. She is on the verge of crawling.

Dude, I was so enraged. It wasn't even my child but I felt the need to say something. Her 5-week old is on the verge of crawling. She should call the Guinness world book of records instead of writing on someone's blog about it. She is a lunatic, making stuff up just to belittle the other child and make her child look better. I mean frankly what was the purpose of that comment except for making the other mom feel inadequate about her child's achievement. Who are these mom. All I could think about was good for you and your child with super powers, this post is not about you at all. When your 5-week old daughter starts to fly maybe we'll have a conversation, until then, move over to the right.

Women of the world, let's pledge to stop this stupid mom competition and support each other. Being a mom is hard job in itself. You don't need anyone putting you down or making you feel inadequate.

If you do these things, stop it. It's not nice at all. Spread the word. When our kids graduate high school or college, they do not get medals for how soon they walked, talked, went to the potty or any of that jazz. Celebrate your children's milestone and achievement but please don't belittle other people's children achievement or milestone in the process. Ok, I am off my soap box.

I leave you with pics of my adorable kids because frankly they make every post beautiful :).

Wearing their Jamaican soccer shirts the day after we came back. My hubby refused to get them matching shirts, tsk tsk tsk.

 Having a pretend picnic in the living room

12 comments:

  1. 1. The so cute and yes they do make every post beautiful :)

    2. Your acquaintances are so rude. I seriously don't get people. Sometimes I think I live in a bit of a bubble, my friends are laid back, jay and his fam are laid back etc because stuff like this makes me go what???? I mean we all put our foot in our mouth sometimes but come on!!!

    3. I really didnt know what to make of that comment on my blog. I was really skeptical about the rolling but wondered why someone would post something untrue! What purpose would lying serve other than to try and make me feel bad (I didn't)? the comment made me wonder why, like what was going on behind the scenes to make someone say that.

    I fully expect to get comments like 'this turorial sucks', 'i hate your style' etc which i get because hey, everyone has differnet tastes and maybe my turorial was hard to follow, etc. But the mom competition? What's the point? My baby is not your baby. End of story.

    I hardly comment on politically charged posts but I felt the need too today!

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    Replies
    1. Sorry for all the typos - I wrote in a rush bc I wanted to comment before time got away from me and it was a week later!

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  2. Girl, when I saw that comment on your blog I was fuming. Seriously. I usually just ignore people's rude comments because foot in the mouth is a disease I am all to familiar with. This all happened within a few days so I had to say something.

    Don't even worry about the typos, who writes perfect English anyway ;).

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  3. I am with you 100%. There are a lot of "super babies" out there. I am shocked we don't hear more about them on TV 😄.
    Yup...pics of your boys do make your post so much more fun. Can't wait to meet them.

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  4. I hear you, and I couldn't agree more. Not just this, but when one mom tears another down based on the decisions they make as parents. This is hard enough with out facing criticism for not breast feeding or for circumcising or whatever it is. As parents, we should know exactly how hard it is to *be* a parent, and support one another regardless of what parenting style we choose. (Disclaimer: this does not hold true when a parent is being abusive or neglectful.) Ugh.

    As always, though, your boys are adorable....such handsome little guys. :)

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  5. My daughter spoke in 4 languages at the age of 2 months, was doing calculus at 5 months, and was contemplating the Origin of the Universe by 1. All kidding aside, this was a great post. Babies all go through the stages of development at their own pace. In a few years, no one will really care when your child took his or her first steps. We all end up walking one way or another.

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  6. I'm not a mom but I completely agree with you. People never cease to make me wonder.

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  7. Hectic!!! Why can't moms just be happy with baby milestones and not make it about them and other moms. I couldnt help but chuckle wen Isaw the super baby comment. True or not, that certainly wasn't the right forum to brag, nor was it appropriate. Good on you for calling her out.

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  8. I just read some of your previous posts and I'm glad you had a wonderful time in Jamaica. I love your boys shirts. Mommy war really sucks. In general as women we really need to do a better job supporting each other.

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  9. HA! If I ever get client's that talk to me like this, I just usually don't talk & hope they go to sleep during a massage! :)
    Some Mom's just feel like they have to prove it all, don't they?

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  10. The desire to one up each other is ridiculous!! It's so obvious that's what is happening too. People who post comment replies like that should be ashamed.

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  11. AMEN SISTER! I have encountered this many times. I am always excited when another mama shares her babies achievement, because it is a milestone, thats it. It doesn't matter when my baby did it, (or didn't do it in most cases). Celebrate not berate. You said it perfectly!

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