So after losing our angel baby on November 2nd, I bled for over 2 weeks. I went in for an U/S afterward and they concluded that everything had passed and I was good to go in that department. Ah the tears and the heartbreak. My Dr wanted to see me a month later on December 19 just to check and make sure everything was ok and talk to us about trying again and all that jazz.
So on December 10, the day we took a day trip to NYC, I decided to take a test. For some bizarre reason, I just thought I was pregnant and I wanted to make sure because I figured I would have a drink and didn't want to do that if i was pregnant. The test was negative. Then 2 days later my boobs were sore like really sore and at that point I just knew I was pregnant so on December 13, I took another test. After a couple of minutes the faintest of faint line definitely showed. My husband swore that there was no line but I just knew. So when December 14th rolled around, exactly 6 weeks to the day that we lost our angel, I took another test. Low and behold the test came back positive. It was still faint but definitely there. I took out the digital (bring on the big guns) and yep yep yep "PREGNANT" it said. We were overjoyed.
Here are the pics of my tests
We decided not to tell anyone until we knew for sure (no need to spread the heartbreak if things went wrong again). Man, can you imagine how difficult this was. Our Dr appointment rolled around a week later on the 19th and after waiting an hour (so annoying) we still didn't have an answer. My Dr ordered a blood test and stated that I could be pregnant or I could be getting a positive test from the last pregnancy. I knew it wasn't, I felt pregnant and it was definitely negative on that Saturday. The result of the blood test came the next day, yep yep yep "PREGNANT" with a beta level of 800 (25 is considered pregnant without a doubt). The Dr ordered another blood test just to make sure that the numbers were increasing as they should. Ah the roller coaster ride of early pregnancy after a loss. Those results came back, still pregnant with a beta level of 1710, that was a great signs, the numbers doubled. She went ahead and scheduled an ultrasound for December 27th.
The day of the ultrasound finally came, you have no idea how scared I was. When the screen came and I saw our little gummy bear, I just started to cry. God is good. God is so good. Hubby and I just held hands and cried tears of joy as we saw that little one on the screen. We are going to have another baby AHHHHHHHH.
The Dr wanted to repeat the ultrasound a few weeks later to make sure that the baby was growing. Never ending roller coaster I tell you. So on Friday the 13th we had another ultrasound. Gummy was looking bigger, less like a dot but more like a baby. Tears of joy. We got to hear the beautiful heartbeat, 178 beats per minutes (that's really good). Our baby is growing AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Praise the Lord.
Here is the picture of our little gummy bear at 8 weeks
It was the longest first trimester ever. I was hysterical, happy, scared, excited, just a mixed bag of emotions all the time. But above all, I was grateful that the Lord sparred me months and months of agony and blessed me with another pregnancy so soon after our angel had gone.
Our very first pic of the belly at 14 weeks. We were so scared this time around that we didn't take any pictures in the beginning at all, we were too scared to jinx things. I didn't write anything about this pregnancy until now. I am feeling hopeful now and feel I can finally start enjoying this pregnancy.
And the next belly pic at 15 weeks, I love that my little man always wants to get in the picture
Today we are 17 weeks and loving life. The pregnancy has been going really well (except for the fear and anxiety) and every day we thank God for his grace. The irony here is that November 2011 was the month we lost our angel but it was also the month that we conceived our rainbow baby. God is good. Please keep us in your prayers that we have a safe pregnancy and a healthy baby. We pray and hope that this is the baby we get to take home.